I feel like I’m dreaming… maybe even floating through my days….
I seem to have lost all focus on anything and everything…
I can’t think straight, I can’t concentrate…
I caught myself staring into space a couple of times…
And I almost walked right into the tracks at the MRT station…
I’m just going to places everyday… cos I’m supposed to.
I’m doing things everyday.. . cos I’m supposed to.
I’m dealing with things everyday… cos I’m supposed to.
I’m even saying the words everyday… just cos I’m supposed to.
Not because I want to…
I’m forgetting important dates and deadlines.
I’m forgetting what needs to be followed up just from the day before about work or school.
I’m forgetting where I place things around the house, when I just bought them.
Will I lose myself one day? Maybe I’ll just forget who I am when I wake up tomorrow.
There are so many things in my head that I just want to do… yet my feet stays plastered to the ground…
I don’t move, and my brain doesn’t work...
I’m lost and tired.
What exactly of, I don’t know.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
2 posts that was written a while ago, but too busy to put up...
here it goes..
I’ve been recently overwhelmed by weddings.
The gorgeous bridal gowns, immaculate men in suits, pretty flowers, luxury wedding bands, numerous carat diamond rings.
The walk down the aisle, the look in their eyes, their shared vows, the sacred kiss, welcoming the mister and missus.
The ‘seal-of-love’ ritual done in ONE day.
I’ve heard ‘getting married is easy, but staying married isn’t’.
How would you know it’ll last forever? Ok. Nothing ever lasts forever.
But what about the shared vows that say, ‘till death do they part’.
How would you know it’ll at least last till then?
I pondered over the thought on ‘how would you know this is the man you’ll want to spend the rest of your life with?”
I asked, and was told “You’ll know it when you meet him.”
She knew it when she met him…
He courted her for 3 years, before she decided to give it a try.
And they spent the next 4 years together…
He proposed, she contemplated for a while, but gave in to ‘THE ONE’ in her life.
She felt he was THE ONE…
They went through marital bliss…
Had their first beautiful daughter, and then came another…
But he found life outside marriage more interesting and so they drifted…
And then it broke and shattered.
So what if he spent 7 years of time and effort, hoping she’ll spend the rest of her life with him?
And then betray those sacred vows they once made and believed in…
“You’ll know it when you meet him”
How trustworthy is that anymore?
How much is there to believe in that statement anymore?
I asked again, and was told “People eventually change through the years… You’ll never be able to expect or be guaranteed of anything everlasting, not even love.”
Then why would anyone want to ever believe in something that might change and leave you with an extreme amount of hurt, disappointment and loneliness?
I was told again that “I guess everyone is just going through the motions of life. Court, date, get married, have children, grandchildren, till death comes knocking.”
Then what meaning is there left anymore?
here it goes..
I’ve been recently overwhelmed by weddings.
The gorgeous bridal gowns, immaculate men in suits, pretty flowers, luxury wedding bands, numerous carat diamond rings.
The walk down the aisle, the look in their eyes, their shared vows, the sacred kiss, welcoming the mister and missus.
The ‘seal-of-love’ ritual done in ONE day.
I’ve heard ‘getting married is easy, but staying married isn’t’.
How would you know it’ll last forever? Ok. Nothing ever lasts forever.
But what about the shared vows that say, ‘till death do they part’.
How would you know it’ll at least last till then?
I pondered over the thought on ‘how would you know this is the man you’ll want to spend the rest of your life with?”
I asked, and was told “You’ll know it when you meet him.”
She knew it when she met him…
He courted her for 3 years, before she decided to give it a try.
And they spent the next 4 years together…
He proposed, she contemplated for a while, but gave in to ‘THE ONE’ in her life.
She felt he was THE ONE…
They went through marital bliss…
Had their first beautiful daughter, and then came another…
But he found life outside marriage more interesting and so they drifted…
And then it broke and shattered.
So what if he spent 7 years of time and effort, hoping she’ll spend the rest of her life with him?
And then betray those sacred vows they once made and believed in…
“You’ll know it when you meet him”
How trustworthy is that anymore?
How much is there to believe in that statement anymore?
I asked again, and was told “People eventually change through the years… You’ll never be able to expect or be guaranteed of anything everlasting, not even love.”
Then why would anyone want to ever believe in something that might change and leave you with an extreme amount of hurt, disappointment and loneliness?
I was told again that “I guess everyone is just going through the motions of life. Court, date, get married, have children, grandchildren, till death comes knocking.”
Then what meaning is there left anymore?
Two souls met a long time ago, way before their bodies do.
According to Plato, the great philosopher,
“With the birth of humans, which looked nothing like how we are now, the man and woman, two different souls, shared one body.
Two heads, four arms and legs, just like two entities joined back to back. The other person was always there.”
“They could walk on forever, since if one pair of legs tire, the other pair would take over.
They possessed ultimate mental and physical strength, and didn’t need the help of any other.”
“But the Greek Gods were displeased with this powerful ‘creature’, which had no need on depending on anyone else, but themselves.
They felt that they were too strong to be overpowered.”
“One particular Greek God could no longer stand the threat, and he used a strong lighting bolt to separate the ‘creature’ into two.”
“Lost are the mental and physical strength.
“Lost are the constant needs of dependence.”
“One would walk on and on, and tire, looking for their other half.”
The belief of soul-mates, were always like some fictional fairytale that lasted forever.
What makes you believe that this fictional fairytale does exist?
Fate does things in small ways that sparks many different emotions.
Happiness, excitement, hope, sadness, hurt, disappointment, guilt.
As long as you’re human, you’ve felt such extreme emotions in one point in your life.
But what exudes all these emotions combined into one?
Love.
Can someone make me believe that it can all come true?
Or do you have to believe in it yourself to let it all come true?
According to Plato, the great philosopher,
“With the birth of humans, which looked nothing like how we are now, the man and woman, two different souls, shared one body.
Two heads, four arms and legs, just like two entities joined back to back. The other person was always there.”
“They could walk on forever, since if one pair of legs tire, the other pair would take over.
They possessed ultimate mental and physical strength, and didn’t need the help of any other.”
“But the Greek Gods were displeased with this powerful ‘creature’, which had no need on depending on anyone else, but themselves.
They felt that they were too strong to be overpowered.”
“One particular Greek God could no longer stand the threat, and he used a strong lighting bolt to separate the ‘creature’ into two.”
“Lost are the mental and physical strength.
“Lost are the constant needs of dependence.”
“One would walk on and on, and tire, looking for their other half.”
The belief of soul-mates, were always like some fictional fairytale that lasted forever.
What makes you believe that this fictional fairytale does exist?
Fate does things in small ways that sparks many different emotions.
Happiness, excitement, hope, sadness, hurt, disappointment, guilt.
As long as you’re human, you’ve felt such extreme emotions in one point in your life.
But what exudes all these emotions combined into one?
Love.
Can someone make me believe that it can all come true?
Or do you have to believe in it yourself to let it all come true?
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